This is a space where I can be confused by the world, think hard about its mysteries, and work out how a myriad of reclaimed and seemingly random pieces could all fit together in some fashion that can make some kind of a sense.

Because I know others are as flummoxed by existence as I am, I thought I would share the resultant outcomes of my puzzling, fragmentary and partial as they may be, in case it helps others in some way.

It is also a small act of reclamation…

Panel 1

what are you looking for?

This site is governed by three organizing principles.

The first, clusters of conversation, suggests a likely subject for the post. However, a post may participate simultaneously in more than one conversation.

The second, if form is your thing, gives you a hint at the length and format of the post. A post may only have one form.

The third, time, provides some insight into the sequential order in which the photos, writings and ideas were formed. That said, time is a malleable illusion which cannot always be trusted.

Panel 2

clusters of conversation

vulnerable natures — humanity, environment, and miracles of resilience

dances of resistance — embodied research practices, choreographies of fearlessness, and acts of resistance

1000 tiny scars — boredom, terror, and violence inherent in the system

reading the city — meaning, place, and fragility at the everyday scale

the unfathomable — that which we cannot embrace, but can sense, feel, and desire nonetheless

Panel 3

if form is your thing

ephemeral readymades — a photo and a title

small unsettlings — usually no more than a paragraph or so of text, and maybe a photo

collateral ponderings — mid-length meditations of a few paragraphs on something or perhaps a few things that seem to be creating strange resonances in my brain and maybe a photo

rooms of ethnographic practice — longer length writings about or exercises in ethnographic practice

Panel 4


the first 33

puzzle factory (12/18/2017) - This is a space where I can be confused by the world, think hard about its mysteries, and work out how a myriad of reclaimed and seemingly random pieces could all fit together in some fashion that can make some kind of a sense. Because I know others are as flummoxed by existence as I … Continue reading puzzle factory
remember, the world is big (12/21/2017) - Remember — the world is big. You are very small, and yet you are of this world. The world calls you. You are not insignificant to it. As SU EN says, “everything is integrated in a dynamic balance.” Which contradictions, which tensions, which desires do you respond to? These choices — intentional or incidental — … Continue reading remember, the world is big
mother ginger (12/23/2017) - I know it has its problems, but I confess, I have loved the Nutcracker since I was a toddler. And I have loved Mark Morris’ The Hard Nut since it first aired on PBS in 1991. Sometimes, I wonder if my own experience as a Polichinelle at such a young age taught me something important … Continue reading mother ginger
listening with our whole selves (12/26/2017) - I don’t know if I heard someone else say this recently or if it came into my head of its own accord, but its been rattling there for the last couple weeks. Its rattling around alongside these two things as well.. 1. Accomplices “listen with respect”, are explicit about their own agendas, are realized through … Continue reading listening with our whole selves
dance everyday (1/1/2018) - Recently I heard someone accuse Nietzsche of saying this. And now I keep wondering what would the U.S. look like if each of us —no matter where we were from or what we did to put food in our bellies — had a little more dance in our daily lives. And then I want to … Continue reading dance everyday
dance destroys floors (1/8/2018) - Wisdom to remember: ‘dance is gentle and beautiful AND it destroys floors’ —  @cannupahanksa ‘dance has brought down entire regimes’ —  @criticalnish Like water, dance can nurture life and transform obstacles in its path. It connects us to the earth and the sky. It helps us dream and understand. It reminds us of our humanity. It teaches … Continue reading dance destroys floors
seats of belonging (1/16/2018) - Upper Left: When I hear the phrase “seats of belonging” I imagine swings floating free in space swinging back and forth on their chains and some how this comforts me. Lower Left: Vector: (math/physics) a quantity possessing both magnitude and direction (biology) an organism that transmits a pathogen Upper Right: (computers) a one dimensional array … Continue reading seats of belonging
a small dance of reclamation (1/20/2018) - In November of 2016, like many women who have been victims of various gradations of sexual violence, assault and oppression, I found myself in shock, fear, rage and dismay. Since then I have been struggling to find a way out of a space of disempowering trauma and back to a space of action and, to … Continue reading a small dance of reclamation
the unfathomable (1/21/2018) - I sit somewhere at a confluence of many, but perhaps most acutely my understanding of our struggle in the world and in art is colored by my (mis)readings and interpretations of on the one hand, the “Godfather of the American avant-garde” Richard Foreman, and, on the other, one of butoh’s founders Tatsumi Hijikata. I see … Continue reading the unfathomable
democracy as dance (1/31/2018) - In Massachusetts most towns operate in a direct democracy system rather than a representative system of legislative councils and community boards. What this means is that anyone registered to vote in the town can participate in Town Meeting and make legislative decisions impacting the town. This week I attended my first Town Meeting. 1200+ people … Continue reading democracy as dance
kaizen, a series of small epiphanies and process of renewal (2/2/2018) - Unfortunately, I don’t recall where I came across a recent reference to “kaizen”, it was something about Toyota’s internal business practices. The article and Wikipedia both define kaizen as the ‘continual improvement of a system via many small changes’. Incremental evolution. Persistent becoming. And then Elon Musk, who counsels us in a recent article in … Continue reading kaizen, a series of small epiphanies and process of renewal
the whisperies (2/7/2018) - Those are the fields of inquiry that I think of immediately when I read that quote from DeLillo. They are of a family for me in that they also, when you get deep enough into their practices of searching out inner consistencies, begin to understand that there is a wonder in the exceptions and imperfections. … Continue reading the whisperies
potholes collecting lost love (2/15/2018) - The cracks.  There are so many cracks and uneven alignments in New York City’s streets the continuous decay combined with continuous construction, digging up holes, patching them back up, only to dig them up again the next week, and then the trees whose roots cannot be held captive under the cement and the ice and … Continue reading potholes collecting lost love
lobster bishop (2/18/2018) - The lobster, his inner parts are his embarrassment, his weak spots, the vitals he protects, his abject soul. Ball is supposed to be dressed up in a bishop’s costume, but he has always looked to me like a lobster – hard protective shell, sharp dangerous claws, soft slightly nervous green innards of incomprehensible poetry stepping … Continue reading lobster bishop
having ground under your feet (2/23/2018) - Remember — having ground under your feet is a privilege. Do you know what you would become without it? This is Paddy Roe. He was an elder of the Gularabulu tribe of the Nyigina aboriginal people from Roebuck Plains in Australia. He is telling a dreaming story. It is a story about the migration of … Continue reading having ground under your feet
to dance without technique (3/1/2018) - Is it possible to be extremely honest To dance without technique To experiment without plan To be the seed, fallen up the stoney place or into the marsh lands And despite the struggle thrive honestly Or must we all pretend, because only in technique only in the fluency of white lies in the splendid vanity … Continue reading to dance without technique
land-sickness (3/9/2018) - Sometimes I wonder if our evolutionary origins in the ocean make some of us more susceptible to a general sense of unease on the land, a kind of perpetual mild land-sickness. One that drives us to move, to wander, to prefer the islands to the inlands, to dream of being in and on the water, … Continue reading land-sickness
man and his pain (3/17/2018) - Perhaps it is because I grew up in a family where “contemplating the infinite” was code for taking a shit, but somehow it seems to me that the most stunning aesthetic beauty is often found in things our social norms deem most abject, most painful, most grotesque. I don’t mean some kind of noble beauty … Continue reading man and his pain
choreography as method of resisting certainty (3/20/2018) - I have these two very different choreographies floating through my head right now. Somehow they are trying to have a conversation there. Both of them bringing beauty into the world and both of them working powerfully on me. One makes the molecules in my body feel a kind of tantalizing, joyful, excited optimism for the … Continue reading choreography as method of resisting certainty
the lonesomeness of the ocean (3/24/2018) - “Then we set down on the sandy bottom where the water was about knee-deep, and watched the daylight come. Not a sound anywheres — perfectly still — just like the whole world was asleep…we would watch the lonesomeness of the river.” – Mark Twain, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. There are so many pans clanging … Continue reading the lonesomeness of the ocean
floating along on the great pacific garbage raft (3/31/2018) - Sometimes I close my eyes and see myself living on a raft that follows the currents of the ocean, slowly making its way across the liquid surface of the planet. The storms come and go reminding me of how tiny and resilient I and my raft are, punctuating the calm, steady boredom of time’s passage … Continue reading floating along on the great pacific garbage raft
the frailty of strength (4/8/2018) - (Ephemeral Readymade 23)
scattered honey wits (4/15/2018) - Do you remember the image, I think it was of Winnie the Pooh, or at least I want that to be its origin, of fluff inside one’s head? That, being “a bear of very little brain”, white fluffy stuffing might fill the remaining void between the ears. This is how my brain feels today: fragments … Continue reading scattered honey wits
you were probably loved once (4/15/2018) - (Ephemeral Readymade 12)
what makes it necessary (5/7/2018) - marginal scribbling caught in a space between worker revolutions of the 1900s and imaginings of future revolutions arising as the governance systems of the western alliances crumble bit by bit under the weight of concentrated wealth and sociopathic flesh
eradicating hunger (5/15/2018) - (Ephemeral Readymade 08)
kindness to strangers (5/29/2018) - “All this they did with simple kindness, talking to their guests and making them welcome, without the slightest idea that they were anything but human travelers as poor as themselves,” (Green, p44). In the Greek mythology that underpins so much of modern western ethics, the wandering man, castaways, strangers and beggars, are sacred to the … Continue reading kindness to strangers
trying to hold the sea and the desert (6/13/2018) -   I am trying to hold these two images in my mind simultaneously. The siren’s sea and the wanderer’s desert lulling me into dreaming.
sometimes i wish society also came with wayfinding (6/28/2018) - (Ephemeral Readymade 05)
every ship has a rope (7/12/2018) - “It’s an old sailor’s idea that every ship has a rope with one end made fast to  her bows and the other held by the loved ones at home.” — from one of Charley Milward’s stories told by Bruce Chatwin in his book, In Patagonia
allow for expansion (7/19/2018) - This guidance could also be applied to the mind. And this could perhaps be applied to the gas tank: “Emptiness accommodates everything. I wonder if thoughts of all kinds intrude themselves at will on our minds because what we call our minds are vacant? If our minds were occupied, surely so many things would not … Continue reading allow for expansion
potatoes and pirates (7/27/2018) - Just thinking about how one’s perspective on the world changes when one’s farmland has been contaminated by geopolitics, economic adversity, governance failures, toxic waste and millions of unexploded ordinances or when one’s fishing waters have been contaminated by geopolitics, economic adversity, governance failures, toxic dumping and illegal foreign trawlers. The small harmless things begin to … Continue reading potatoes and pirates